"On The Pimp: Thief."

As a sort of tribute to my good friend, and in many cases, mentor Ringthree, I wanted to do my own take on a little project he's started entitled "On the Cheap". Now, Ringthree has written a few guides for jobs were he instructs the casual end game player on how to properly outfit said job without being super OMFG uber. This is not to say that you won't have to invest a pretty penny sometimes, but for the most part it does stay true to his title.

Unlike, Ringthree though, I don't want to teach you to justify your gimpiness. Sorry. But that shit just don't fly with me. So, I present to you...

On The Pimp; Thief.

First let's cover the rules of "On The Pimp."

1. You can't be gimp. Sorry, if you are gimp, I can't help you. If you are the kind of person that hears something and then sticks to it no matter what, just quit now. If you can't adapt to changes in the game, quit. If you refuse to do something because something isn't worth that much gil, then just fucking die in a fire. MONEY is key, the more we have in the game, the more we fucking pwn all over the gimpy-ass newbs!

2. You have to really be an end-game player. I am expecting you to have every title in the game, and have done every mission everywhere, I do expect you to have done main story-line content. This should be a goal of an end-game player at the very least. Zilart should be finished. CoP should be finished. Aht Urghan should be finished. If you don't have these, or at least most of it and trying to get to the end, then you aren't an end-game player, you are just lazy or your are just making pretend. So DIAF.

3. You have to be able to do ALL end-game events. I am not demanding that you be in a full-time HNM LS, you should at least CO-OWN it. If you don't then you really aren't an end-game player, you are just a player with a job at 75.

4. You have to be willing to spend gil. Not just a LOT of gil. All of it. That's why it's called the Pimp. I am going to tell you to get all HQ gear, regardless of price, and I will also indicate expensive items that you will need anyway. This is like the Frugal Gourmet for FFXI. Yes, I know, none of you got that reference. :(*

*This has nothing to do with MY guide, I just wanted to leave it in so we all know how much of a nerd Ringthree is.

Ok! Now on with the show!

1. Weapon
Is there really ANY need to discuss this? Mandau. Vajra. Let's move on.

What? Ok! No, you're right, you're right. Ok, X's Knife is very, very good. But, we're not trying to maximize our potential here, we're trying to be Pimp. X's Knife is good, but technically...it's free. So, fork over the Millions of Gil for Mandau and Vajra, gimp.

The only real problem here is which do you Main Hand and which do you Off Hand? Honestly...switch it up a bit. Mon\Wed\Fri Mandau, Tue\Thu\Sat, Vajra. Midnight to Noon, Mandau. Noon to Midnight, Vajra. Done deal.

2. Ranged\Ammo
Now to be trully PIMP, you can't just have one...so, what you're going to need is a Ziska's Crossbow, of course. Then you'll also want a Fire Bomblet for TP and then a Bomb Core for WS. Since you won't lose TP just switching your Ammo. Moving on.

3. Head
This one is really a no brainer...for TP you're going to want a Walahra Turban, I know, I know...doesn't cost much. But, really, you won't be standing around in Whitegate in your W. Turban -- because your WS piece is the big shiner! Hecatomb Cap +1. The real goal of being truly Pimp is so get that White Box around EVERYTHING. Ok, Professional Pimp Kat Williams will be the first to tell you -- the more shine, the better. Every day you be hustlin'.

4. Neck
Now, it's at the neck we sort of run into another problem with the TP set...the best choice is going to be a Love Torque...however, Love Torques aren't really that far out of your grasp if you put in enough work. So, I suggest spending a few million on the Ancient Torque. Not as good...sure, but remember, it's not about functionality. It's about status. So if anyone tries to tell you other wise, just say you screwed thier mom. For WS, go ahead and use this, the Love Torque, or better yet, spend money to get people to farm you organs for the WS Gorgets.

5. Earrings
Ok, first and most obvious choice...buy all your ABCs and get a Brutal Earring -- other accessories though they won't cost you much gil, are Delta Earring and Suppanomimi. You can also purchase a Pixie Earring from a local HNM shell.

Now, to be truly Pimp -- screw ALL of these and just drop your gil into two Androit Earrings +1. Again, keep that White Shimmering Box in mind all the time.

6. Body
I'm going to be met with a bit of resistance here...but, it's got to be said. For WS Gear -- you're going to want to make a judgement call. Skadi's Body is easily the best...however, Hecatomb +1 may be more gil depending on your server. So check prices -- there's also something to be said about a person who has FULL +1 gear, rather then someone who is missing one piece. For TP I'd go for the Antares Harness, nice and expensive piece. If only we had some way to HQ it.

7. Hands
This one should be a no brainer to everyone! Dusk Gloves +1 and Hecatomb Mittens +1 is going to easily cost you around 30 Mil. If you even have to question this, just give up and go play WoW.

8. Rings
Do Thunder Rings have a HQ Version? Find out. Buy them. That's for WS, of course, for TP you're going to need two Sniper Rings +1. You can't afford not to have them.

9. Back
With the addition of the WotG Campaign Ops BCNM in each of the Allied Nations -- we now have one of the most expensive back pieces! Cuchulain's Mantle! Easy 3-4 Mil for WS...but...for TP, and standing around in Whitegate you'll need to pick up a Cerberus Mantle +1. Gotta have those White Boxes lined up for the /check after all.

10. Waist
No discussion here. Sonic Belt +1. Don't even take it off for WS. Anyone who ever checks you needs to see this and only this. Period.

11. Legs
Sadly, Skadi's Legs are very affordable and all the other pieces for TP in this slot are virtually free. So, go with the Skadi's as they say more about how much time you dedicate to playing. The WS piece is a no brainer -- as long as you've been following this guide you should know...Hecatomb +1, duh.

12. Feet
This will of course round out the Hecatomb +1, completing our WS Gear and FULL HQ Hecatomb. As for TP...all the good options are more or less free. Buy a pair of Strider's Boots, just so you can run circles around all the gimpies. It just doesn't make sense to come to the final gear slow and NOT spend money on it, you know?

Now, you have to realize -- playin' the game within the game and being a playa is a very difficult job. This guide here, really only serves to get you started...it's a foreword, more than anything. So as you start pimping yourself out you need to keep in mind that other then a TP and WS set there's a LOT more you need to focus on...below are only a few other sets you should invest some time and money into.

• Haste Set for TP Gain
• Accuracy Set for TP Gain
• Attack Set for Parsing Closer to other DDs
• Ranged Accuracy Set
• Kiting Set
• Solo Set
• Shark Bite WS Set
• Dancing Edge WS Set
• Evisceration WS Set
• TP Set Geared toward Off Handing your Ridill
• TP Set Geared toward Off Handing your Kraken Club
• Evasion Set
• Sneak Attack Solo Set
• Trick Attack Solo Set
• Enmity Gear Set
• SATA Solo Set
• SA WS Set
• TA WS Set
• SATA WS Set

So, with all of this under your belt...I wish you luck. =) Once again, this has been "On the Pimp; Thief."

Sudden Change of Fortune.

So, big news, huh? I finally feel like I'm a Salvager now. I don't think having certain pieces is required, of course, but when I look at my check list, I am now 11\15. And even though, I only have one piece completed, I don't feel so gimp around people like Omoi, Ring and Izman. Even though I still am.

So, yes, I am now 3\3 on Skadi Body...luckily, I began preparing for this several months ago. I spent 4 Million Gil in about 30 seconds last night to get my 4 Ingots I currently I have. Today, I spent the majority of my time cleaning out my MH...and deciding what I could do without for a few months.

Most people I know who have Salvage Bodies fall under two categories; A. Work hard and long and eventually get your body. B. Bitch a lot and get your body super quick, then bitch that the game doesn't give you what you want.

I'm not going to be A or B. For one, I'm not going to bitch I don't get my gear...because I'm going to have Skadi Body! WOO! As for A, I have been working hard, but I'm not going to wait long. My Evasion Setup is suffering a bit as I AH a few of those pieces, and my RNG is even being put back on the shelf until I complete the Skadi Cuirie.

In the end though, it's all going to be worth it! I have about 2 Mil worth of gear that I'm selling, that will put me at 6 Ingots -- the halfway point. I have a single Khroma Ore in my MH, thats like 6.5 ingots. And I've got 30,000 IS I want to use on ISNMs for more Khroma Ore ASAP.

We also have a KS99 coming up in Versus soon and that will help so much, if I lot high enough to use an Orb and get a bit lucky. Otherwise, I've had another friend (Love you Luso!) offer to use his hundreds of Beastman Seals in effort to get a K Club, which would in turn, benefit all three of us involved in doing the BCNM. =)

Other than all that, expect to be /sea'ing me in The Boyahda Tree a hell of a lot in the next few weeks!

I'm also extremely excited now because of Crystalline Prophicies. I no longer have to make a TP\WS Mirke Coat. And since RNG is on the back burner again, I'm not going to worry about a RNG Mirke Coat. However, I am going to sell my Scorpion Harness for now to fund the Skadi Cuirie, so my Mirke Coat will be transformed with Acc\Eva or Eva\Dual Wield into a Scorpion Harness +3.

Also! Soon to come, a post about Nyzoolie Isle! Been doing quite a bit of that and I've gotten far enough now that I'd like to talk about it a bit.

And as a P.S. Thank you to Izman, Omoi, Celes, Blaize, Ring, Qtip and Darkdawn ~ They were my group for my 35. =) <3<3<3 Even if they did make me pull the 4th floor Gears ; ; (Which in a way makes the drop a little more sweet.)

I'm a Huge, Goddamn Nerd.

This will be quick.

But not painless.

...not for me at least.

So! I had a dream last night. I dreamed about Skadi Jambeaux. Not just like, "Oh, hey I'm in a dream and I can see I have Skadi Feet. Cool." No, it was the major driving action of the dream. See, Versus was fighting ...something, it felt like it was Mother Globe, but we were kiting her around some factory(?) in a spaceship (?) and she was a giant Pylon (from Star Craft) and she spawned the little Probes that harvest for the Protoss. Anyhow. Thanks to my Skadi Feet I was able to kite everything with Ranged Attacks while we regroupped and the Skadi Boots were like SEX! They were so fucking awesome! I was kiting backwards and everything ; ;

...God, I'm such a nerd.

Sadness...

No, Ringthree didn't have another heart attack. But thank you for your concern.

I hear Libraries have great Health Coverage.

So, today I went and signed a lease for my new place I'll be moving to in May with a person some of you may know as Argetlam -- for those who don't, he's my roommate. My plan was, since this Apartment Complex owns pets was to get myself a kitten. In fact! One of my cats back home JUST had kittens and they'll be old enough to leave on...May 1st! Perfect! However...in order to move a pet in you have to have it spaded (in my kitties case) and de-clawed. Which means, I can't have a cat. Because you can't get them spaded and de-clawed until they're like 6-8 months old. =( She wouldn't be a kitty no more and it's no fun having a pet if you don't have it from when it's super small so you can watch them grow.

So, it's with great sadness I have to annouce that I won't be getting an Izkitty (that was going to be her name.)

I'm going to go cry quietly in the corner. ; ;

So Jess Will Stop Whining...

Here's a Blog Post...Ahem...

Fuck you Arrapago Remnants. Ok, look Salvage...I know you think that maybe I don't have the right to complain because, hell, Izman went who knows how long without getting his Ares Pants. But you know what? Fuck you! You gave him his body and head piece prior, AND at least his has always been a rare drop.

You see people, I could deal with it if like, no one had Skadi's Boots, ya know? But, guess what, EVERYONE DOES! Even the Dragoon who plays a Bard and White Mage! (And is now leveling Thief just to spite me in those damn sexy little Jambeaux! =P)

So, yes. Fuck you Arrapago Remnants.

There Jess, that's your Blog Post.

<3 Everyone.